5 Simple Questions That Help You To Align With Yourself

A self-check a day keeps the standstill away

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

What new insight or piece of knowledge did I learn today?

Creativity coach and photographer Eberhard Schuy in Germany has found one way to keep his creative juices and new ideas flowing. He keeps an open mind and commits to staying curious and fascinated by the things he encounters throughout his day.

At the end of each day, he briefly reflects: Looking back, what did I do today that I didn’t know this morning?

Make it a habit to ask you this quick question every night.

Am I listening?

Chris Voss is a former lead international kidnapping negotiator for the FBI and he describes in his book Never Split the Difference the importance of listening. „If while you’re making your argument, the only time the other side is silent is because they’re thinking about their own argument, they’ve got a voice in their head that’s talking to them. They’re not listening to you. When they’re making their argument to you, you’re thinking about your argument, that’s the voice in your head that’s talking to you.”

Understanding the wants and desires of the other side is important when it comes to trying to achieve favorable outcomes. Human emotions are extremely important in conversations and negotiations, and also when you talk to kidnappers.

“The goal is to identify what your counterparts actually need (monetarily, emotionally, or otherwise) and get them feeling safe enough to talk and talk and talk some more about what they want.”

What is the point of not making the effort to listen properly to your kid, spouse, colleague, business partner, or person in crisis and then having the conversation or argument left unsatisfied or unresolved?

“Ask questions that show you’ve been paying attention and with that knowledge, move the discussion forward”, Chriss Voss writes.

Did I take a moment to just be?

“It’s the moments that I stopped just to be, rather than do, that have given me true happiness. Why? Because allowing yourself just to be, puts things into perspective. Try it. Be still. Be present.” – Sir Richard Branson, English Business Magnate, Investor, Philanthropist, and Founder of the Virgin Group.

Just be. Feel yourself. Check in with yourself once a day.

What if I say No?

Saying No to others means saying Yes to yourself.

"There will always be an unending supply of opportunities, things to do, causes you care about, and on and on. Knowing when and how to say no to projects, social invitations, and other requests or your time frees you up to focus on objectives that matter." - Warren Buffet

What Buffett and Bill Gates both claim is that focus is their secret weapon to success. No matter how much money a person makes, they are still limited by time. Everyone has the same number of hours in a day, days in a week, and weeks in a year.

“People think focus means saying yes to what you’ve got to focus on. But that’s not what it means at all. It means saying No to the hundred other good ideas that there are. You have to pick carefully. I’m actually as proud of the things we haven’t done as the things I have done.” - Steve Jobs

Knowing when and how to say No is what distinguishes you from others because it helps you to maximize your time, and focus on the things that matter most to you.

Are you aware of how often you said Yes to something you would rather not have agreed to?

Did I notice the little precious moments today?

“The true secret of happiness lies in taking a genuine interest in all the details of daily life.” – William Morris, English designer, craftsman, and poet.

In 1952 Henri Cartier-Bresson, one of the important photographers in modern photojournalism introduced a fascinating and highly debated concept in the history of photography: “the decisive moment.” This moment occurs when the visual and psychological elements of people in a real-life scene spontaneously and briefly come together in perfect resonance to express the essence of that situation. Some people believe that the unique purpose of photography, as compared to other visual arts, is to capture this fleeting, quintessential, and holistic instant in the flow of life.

The precious moments in your life are in the art of noticing. Pausing long enough to be able to pay attention to the special moments that surround you.